Which option would provide the most "shock" value to spice up our sex life? Wife says we are predictable?
Ok...so after 12 years of being together, my wife says to me after our last romp that we really need to change our pattern. We used to do it in cars,...
Ok…so after 12 years of being together, my wife says to me after our last romp that we really need to change our pattern. We used to do it in cars, on the counter, on the stairs, etc.. Now it has become the same rerun over and over….I go down, she goes down, her on top, and lastly the standard position to finish. She actually told me that she can almost time each procedure right down to the last second.
She insists that I become more spontaneous and provide some sort of "shock value" to spice it up.
I recently went to the adult gallery to pick up some interesting new toys. I drove 30 minutes away to the city so that no one would see me in the one in my home town ( the PTA lady saw me there last year renting a movie—– its in the SUBWAY plaza and she was picking up lunch )
So, I have an assortment of little toys to display. But, thinking that would not be really enough to add real excitment to the event, I have entertained the following options:
A- I purchased a small golf cart battery with cables at Walmart that I will attach to her nips after I tie her up and blindfold her, or
B- found on Craigslist, a Asian dwarf escort (female) —I’ll hide her in the closet until the right time, then have her jump out and yell something Ninja like…
A or B?
lol @ Skwerl
Hi Maggs — nice to see you again!! and no, I have not learned anything.
Scoundy– she has been gone since Thanksgiving……you did not leave her tied up in the basement again did you?
Boum- I cannot believe someone gave you a TD… anyway, you do bring up a good point about cardiac arrest…I’m thinking of keeping the battery ready to go in case the little ninja is too much for her to take…this way I can jump start her back to life
Well, B sounds like a perfectly acceptable idea and COULD accomplish what your wife is hoping for, but let me suggest something a little more "spontaneous"… tell her you want to take her out to dinner… make sure she wears a dress or skirt or something that’ll make the process easier… go to your local McDonald’s or Burger King or some kind of fast food place that has a good amount of spectators and start doing it right there on a table (after ordering your food and finding a table of course)… have her yell "THIS IS HOW BABY’S ARE MADE KIDS!" while you high-five the guy sitting at the table next to you… if anybody asks you to stop, pull out, face directly at them and say "there’s plenty to go around"…
[C] Bucket of eels.
I’m going out on a limb here and going with [D] none of the above.
I’m all about A but I think most will go with B.
You know us women are being hard to please when we’re not satisfied with the King of Sparta.
B’s the funniest so that gets my vote.
Thanks for the Troll house moment.
I know how to solve that problem. Next time she complains about it being too routine, just apply a little bengay on her nubbin. She will start screaming and moaning and thrashing around. After the whole thing is done, she will have forgotten what she was talking about and have something else to discuss with you.
lol @ your question Ted.
Getting a new person in the bedroom may be interesting. I hope your dear wife doesn’t have cardiac issues, though.
B, plus me running the video camera.
B for sure you could actually bring the midget back week to week dressed up as different things because as we all know everything is better when a midget is involved
I would go with A, but my wife and I have discussed these things and done a lot of them.
In all seriousness I recommend that you and wifey sit down and talk about the sort of kinks you both might be interested in before trying them. Electrosex is pretty advanced and can be dangerous. If you really want to try that or tying or anything involving intense pain I suggest you find your local kink/BDSM community. These communities often have instructional workshops for different kinds of play. You should take these workshops or get to know people who have experience and can give advice in the things you want to try.
Both options are good Ted. When your *wife was over here ….. erm I mean away on her travels. she must have come upon exciting times. After all, Englishmen … erm I mean men of a different country to the USA, can make the whole process of sex more exciting.
Try option A – she liked that ….. erm I mean she WOULD like that I guess (but it is only a guess you understand). However, always remember that the human body conducts electricity but you should be OK if you wear a condom and latex gloves – that should protect you against any electric shocks.
Hope this helps
edit
Happy New Year Maggs xx
If were your wife, I would not want any of those options. But of course you can still try to do any of those with her, if you think it’s going to be exciting for your wife. You might also want to try some of the tips to heat up your sex life which were mentioned in an article I found at http://bit.ly/8BiF2t. It has great ideas for couples who wanted something more exciting.
I’m gonna go with A here Ted….anytime something can be attached to the nips…well….Hattie OJ…need I say more?
I highly recomend staying AWAYYYYY from closets ……I think you have spent your fair share in closets …and frankly….I would think you knew better. (some people never learn)
edit…Happy New Year Teddy…..and Scoundy !!!…smooch
I am not sure about option A.
Its great that she is open to variations. I am sure if you socut around the internet you will find may good ideas – try forums etc.
Have you tried sensual massage? Public nudity etc.